Where has all the Phone Fun Gone???

In my online travels, I have been very lucky.

Over the last 7 years, until about a year and a half ago, I have had regular phone sex partners.

But it was strange. It was like one girl every year. That girl would get married, start dating, or just decide she didn't want to do it anymore.

Then, almost miraculously, I would meet another girl very shortly afterwards to start the cycle again.

With each girl, I had a deep connection and strong emotional bonds, as it wasn't just phone sex.

A year and a half ago, the last girl I'm referring to got married and went offline, BH.

I have yet to meet the "next" sweet, wonderful girl for regular chatting and fun.

I have met a few women since who were very fun and I like a lot, but for whatever reason they cannot talk on a regular basis due to other factors going on in their lives.

I have yet to meet another girl wo has the time, willingness and desire to have phone conversations on a regular basis.

But I was thinking...even if I did meet such a girl, why not just date her seriously?

Three-Some or Three's a Crowd??

Where do I find these people?

I met a woman online recently who is in her mid 50s and going through a sexual awakening of sorts.

She is actually going through it with her husband at the same time.

They venture out to certain clubs together, and find exhibitionism very erotic.

Well, one day her and I were talking over the microphone, when her husband came in the room and started touching her.

He knows about me.

Long story short, he was fucking her as I was talking to her.

very very hot!!! hope to do it again.

but still...kind of weird

and no, I'm NOT GAY in any way...so don't even go there...lol

For Love, Marriage....or for Sex????

What the hell is wrong with me? Ok, don't answer that...lol

I got set up with a very nice girl and I called her for the first time last night.

It was a very fun, pleasant, easy going conversation. I really enjoyed her company...until....

Until a girl came online who I know who I have had great phone sex with in the past, and who might want to have phone sex again.

I've had phone sex with her hundreds of times, but in the last year, she has been better, or just not in the mood, or needing the "real thing".

So, for the mere glimmer of hope that some girl would help me shoot my load, I kind of ignore this wonderful girl on the phone.

Sure, I still talked to her with fake laughter, saying "ya" when appropriate,and even interjecting a story or two.

But my focus was diverted elsewhere.

I obviously want love and marriage, both together ideally (unfortunately that can be mutually exclusive these days), but my body tells me that I want to hear this other girl moan with pleasure.

What is wrong with me?

Oh, and you all probably guessed....no phone sex with that online girl...she wasn't in the mood.

I soooo wish I wasn't in the mood either

Sex or marriage.

Why am I constantly drawn to the wrong choice?

Dateless in Seattle???

No, I'm not from Seattle, but I am dateless.

Haven't had a date in a few months.

At least with dating, you feel like you're "in the sugya"

But lately, I've been feeling that days are turning into weeks and into months and I'm not getting any younger.

maybe I should call that girl back? the one who was sweet, frum, pretty etc etc, but I just didn't FEEL IT.

Any thoughts?

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Regular or Pervert? (Fine Fantasies?? The Sequel)

Another fantasy that I have come across might be even worse than the rape fantasy, since as mentioned, for some reason it appears that many women have rape fantasies, or fantasies of submission.

Obviously, though, they would abhor it ACTUALLY happening, but for a fantasy, it's a safe escape from the potential bore of their regular sex lives.

But over the past years, and specifically at the current time, I am speaking to 6 "frum" women who have an EXTREMELY TABOO fantasy.

Incest.

Yes, you heard me correctly...incest!!

As in a sexual relationship with a close family member.

GROSS!! DISGUSTING!! YUCKY!! AWFUL!!!

Now, none of them would ever do it for real, and none of them think about any person under the age of consent. But some are more inclined to push the envelope in teasing more than others.

But they do very actively fantasize about their fathers, brothers, and one woman even fantasizes about her son who is about 22 or 23 years old.

Again, I do not condone such thoughts or behavior, but I am just raising the issue.

The Torah obviously forbids it. In fact, we read about incestuous relationships on mincha of yom kippur, for various reasons.

However, the mere fact that the Torah had to include it as forbidden, must be that people have thought about, and do think such images.

The Torah doesn't have to give a law that we should breathe, because that is ingrained.

If it was ingrained that incest is so repulsive and disgusting than the Torah would not have had to mention it.

Now, incestuous fantasies are probably more common among boys, who think of their mothers or sisters or aunts.

I know a number of people who have either admitted to me, or mentioned in jest some incestuous statements...

Or even one guy I know who got a bit too "spiritual" one Purim and told me very flat out, and I quote, "My mom is a real MILF, don't you think so too???"

Even the term MILF, made famous by the movie American Pie, indicates that incest has permeated the "main stream".

There are main stream movies and TV shows (such a Nip/Tuck) with incestuous story-lines.

I have even met a frum woman years ago online, who was divorced, and her son, in yeshiva, was also divorced, and she told me that they have engaged in sexual acts, but not full sex, although she feared...or hoped...or both...that full sex was forthcoming. Now again, who knows if she was telling the truth or not, but she sounded sincere over the phone.

Other women I have had phone sex with who asked to play those fantasies have had HUGE, intense orgasms, moreso than if we roleplayed something less "forbidden".

Perhaps it is the forbidden nature of it, the taboo. I don't know.

For frum boys, it might be that since they don't have much contact with the opposite sex (which I actually think is a good thing), then the only women they know freely who let their hair down, figuratively and literally, are their sisters and mothers.

But I was initially shocked to find how many women think the same things.

So, is this a fine fantasy? Are all fantasies fine, as long as it does not involve a minor?

I know many women have thoughts of their son-in-laws. In fact, there is a blog that I read about a women who talks about that openly.

Obviously, sons are very different. But is there some comparison.

When do fantasies go over the line?

Again, for people who have been abused by a family member, I apologise if it brings to the surface terrible memories, and I think it is TERRIBLY wrong...but I guess you know more htan anyone that those thoughts are present in the minds of people.

But are they regular people or did they pervert their minds?

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Fine Fantasies???

Let me start by saying that this entry is quite delicate, but I think it needs some elucidation.

Let me first say, that any person who has been physically or emotionally abused should seek professional therapeutic help and should even contact the appropriate authorities.

I do not condone any violence or abuse/molestation in any way shape or form. It is evil immoral, illegal, and wrong.

I do not mean to hurt or offend anyone by this blog and apologize ahead of time if I do so.

This posting is not for everyone to read, so please use judgment as to whether you want to continue reading.

What are fantasies? How do they develop? How can they be satisfied or fulfilled?

I have been thinking quite a bit about this topic for quite some time.

When I first arrived online and started chatting about 8 or 9 years ago, I was initially shocked to hear some of the thoughts that women have.

I always knew that men are perverts, but women!?!? I was stunned.

The first time a woman told me she has a fantasy of being raped, I couldn't believe it. What woman would have that as a sexual fantasy that she gets aroused by?

After years of becoming less naive (unfortunately), I have realized that it is a fairly common and prevalent fantasy that many women have.

Let me again reiterate that I am NOT in favor of rape in any way, and I am not saying that every single woman thinks about rape.

What I am saying is that MANY (not all, not even most) women think about it.

Obviously, this fantasy is not necessarily about the sex. It is about the control, strength of the man and submission of the woman. The idea of giving up control, etc.

In my online travels, I have spoken to three women who have been raped in reality (there might have been more than i spoke with, but these 3 told me about it). Beyond the horrific nature of the act which was perpetrated against these women, there was another reaction.

One woman told me that it was the worst day of her life, but that she has never had a more powerful and intense orgasm in her whole life. That, in turn, made her feel more guilty for "enjoying it".

It has manifested itself for her, in that since that day, she has tried to find sexual experiences which are harder, rougher, more violent...just to relive the feeling.

She DOES NOT want to be raped again, but it has now become part of who she is and part of her sexual make-up.

So, I ask...

Are all fantasies fine? or are there some fantasies that should be discouraged? (omitting obviously fantasies about children which should be punished and discouraged)

Please let me know your thoughts. I have tried to be sensitive about this topic, so please respond in kind.

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Nothing New Under the Sun?

So, I have been away for awhile. on vacation, sabbatical, whatever.

And even afte ra month away, I come back here with absolutely nothing new to report.

No dates, no prospects, not even any fun online play partners.

Just a lot more masturbating and feeling pleasure for a second.

I guess life is like that...ups and downs

Hopefully, things will pick up BH